Turn that frown upside down.

Dingbat to get golden parachute!

After a lifetime of public service, chewing gum aficionado David Dingwall is negotiating a golden parachute with the Federal Government. Apparently this is standard operating procedure within 48 hours after resigning in disgrace. It’s not in the Liberal Red book but it should be in the Liberal Playbook.

Seeing as it was the Tories that exposed Dave’s bizarre expense accounts in the first place, I say put them in charge of packing Dave’s Parachute. Let them pack it and let them be the ones who give him the thumbs up as he exits the plane. Perhaps 30 000 feet above Rivermead golf course would be nice.

In his final act of selfless public service he can fertilize the 18th hole.